I'm Ba-a-a-a-ck!!!

Hello to all my friends - all those who haven't withdrawn because I've not been here much in the last few months!  I have thought about you and missed you.  Times available to get online were very limited during this trip as wifi hotspots were not always available.

I arrived back in Tucson last Wednesday, two days earlier than I planned.  It was a good trip - a challenging trip - an educational trip - an expensive trip!!!  I put over 6,000 miles on my truck and saw a lot of Oregon and a bit of Washington.  Unfortunately, for much of the trip I felt very limited by my companion's life situation.  I state that fact here, and because I don't want to revisit my feelings of resentment, I'll not speak anymore about it.

I learned a LOT about me, and what I want and don't want when it comes to traveling with another person!  You can read about the trip here.  There are a few photos that I inserted later from earlier in the trip, once I learned how.

One highlight of my trip was meeting a fellow from Washington at the local solar fair in John Day.  He had his telescope pointed at the sun so folks could view it.  He was reading a book, and I inquired about it - it was on the Enneagram.  My inquiry began a conversation that lasted over three hours, sharing life stories, stories about recent losses of significant people in our lives, sharing our tears and hugs, and holding hands.  We exchanged email addresses and have corresponded a few times since then.  I bought a copy of the same book, and began to study it, to see what I'm like, and to ask about that from my traveling companion.  I can say I've had my eyes opened a lot.

And I can say that in reviewing how I've lived my life, in many ways I've been a team player, not taking much for myself.  I'm learning that that needs to change.  It's good sometimes to be a team player, but only when there is an agreement that you're on a team!!!

These two weeks of preparation for going to New Mexico are very full of still more 'doing' - oil change/tire rotation, cleaning out my storage shed and packing the stuff in the truck, getting prescriptions filled, and visiting my Crone friends, mailing things to family so I'm not taking them with me down the road.

Yesterday I found a box of year books and albums of travels - the box was so heavy that I decided I would let go of these 'memories' - I don't need the material things to remember what's in my heart about where I've been - and my children are not interested in having that stuff.  So I think...what a waste it all was.  Today I threw out all my city planning drawings from my graduate program.  Who in the least would care about them?  And large framed posters that I appreciated when I had a condo are going to Goodwill on Monday.  I've already been there once so far.

It is a little unnerving to see that all my worldly goods are packed in the back of my truck and in my trailer.  I've let go of so much in the last few years, and I'm thinking that it ain't over yet!  It's interesting to see that I am letting go of what is no longer needed or wanted, and that I am adding new things that bring me enjoyment.  I seem to be following some kind of guidance, and I have no idea where things are headed for me.  And through it all I still have what I need, and much of what I want.  And tomorrow is not guaranteed.  I still struggle to not be afraid.